Enveloped In Love – Our Kiddush Experience

On Feb 26, 2022, my family hosted the kiddush for Brian’s 10th  birthday party – first time double digits is an exciting chapter! The moment we entered synagogue, congregants wished Brian a happy birthday. Rabbinic Intern, Lily Lucy, welcomed us into the Hinei Ma Tov JLC event, by wishing Brian a good birthday and pointing out to the other students that the birthday table covers, balloons and food items were all set up so that the congregation could celebrate Brian entering his double-digit birthday. It made Brian feel so special. Continue reading

Happy Birthday Kiddush

The building was teeming with people this past Shabbat with JLC, the Henei Mah Tov service, Tot Shabbat, and the regular service in the sanctuary. The social hall was party-like with birthday balloons and colorful tableware.

What a pleasure to have so many young kids and their parents sharing the space and a very special kiddush lunch.

That first double digit birthday is a big deal for any kid. We were able to be a part of Brian Singh’s entry into “tweenhood.” Continue reading

It’s Kiddish Time

The sounds of prayer were complemented by the buzz of conversation as Shomrei celebrated the upcoming wedding of Jared Hurwich and Perrin Shapiro at the first indoor kiddush in almost two years.

The kiddush crew was out in full force prepping for this kiddush which was just a bit different from what they used to do. Instead of artfully arranged platters, there were trays of individual containers to grab and take to the tables. Cookies were snuggled into a foil pan with a see through tops so that the contents could be seen and labels abounded to identify the foods on display. Continue reading

A Guy Who Likes Everything: A Defense

Recently my positive comments about an event were dismissed with the statement “Oh, you like everything.” I laughed and said it was in my nature. But, the truth is I don’t like everything. In fact, I can be very judgmental and at times enjoy being so. But, the point being made by my “accuser” was that I was being indiscriminate, lacking in discernment, and therefore my judgement was suspect or not to be taken seriously. My father (of blessed memory) was also criticized for liking “everything.” After all, how could anyone take someone seriously if they like everything! Continue reading

Baby It’s Cold Outside

When I was a kid growing up in Lowell, Massachusetts (when winters were really cold and the snowdrifts were over my head), we had a summer cottage on a very small lake about 15 minutes from home. In the winter, we’d bundle up, get our skates and drive out to the lake and go ice skating.

After the cold got to be too much, we’d sit on shore, rosy cheeked, and sip hot cocoa from an old fashioned thermos.

Funny how it’s the little things that make the most indelible memories. Continue reading

Breaking the Hate: White Supremacy and Immigration

IMG_7797Shomrei members attended a session about immigration led by Reverand David Shaw of the Union Congregational Church on March 4.  The session is part of the Interfaith “Break the Hate ” series developed by Union Baptist Church. Several of the people who attended share their recollections and thoughts about the evening:

Aileen Grossberg

Reverend David Shaw presented a concise and illuminating history of immigration and immigration restrictions. We were all reminded that, despite what Emma Lazarus’s poem on the base of the Statue of Liberty might say, the U.S. policy on immigration has been restrictive for much of our history. To be reminded of this was very disillusioning.

I also thought sharing with a small group was effective. The activity broke up the intensity of listening, made the history become real, and helped us examine our own relationship to the idea of “American.”

Linda Ariel

I was not sure what I expected from last night’s program, Impact of White Supremacy on Immigration. Each of the two previous programs seemed to be more of a reflection of the presenter’s personality, perspective, and background. As such, I am becoming more knowledgeable about the different faith communities in Montclair, the people, their history, and their spiritual perspective.

Reverend David Shaw was an engaging speaker who was comfortable in sharing his experience in coming to the United States as a ‘migrant’, the verbiage he most often used to discuss the people who come to live in the United States of America. He interspersed didactic information with allowing us to discuss our own experiences in smaller groups. This allowed us to form ties with congregants of different religious institutions throughout greater Montclair, which for me broke down the anonymity of the people attending the presentation. Indeed, in attending the three meetings of this series and being engaged in an interfaith women’s group on our town, I am beginning to recognize people who used to be strangers to me and feeling more and more connected to other participants who share common values.

History is not my strong suit, so Reverend Shaw’s review of the history of migration in the US and the evolution of our country’s attitudes to newcomers here was very informative and enhanced the discussions in the small groups.

I continue to learn not only from the people who present each evening, but from listening to the others attending the series. It is important to listen closely to our neighbors and move from being strangers, to acquaintances, and hopefully in the long term to being friends.

Sarita Eisenberg

Several things struck me during the evening. I’ll highlight one – the discussion about who is a “real American”. 

Reverend Shaw is an immigrant. He pointed out, however, that his is not the prototypical immigrant experience as he came from England. No one has ever questioned his right to be here and, now that he is a citizen, no one suggests that he is not a “real American”.  This was also the experience an older gentlemen in my breakout group who came to the U.S. from Scotland about 25 years ago in response to a job offer. No one has ever suggested that he was taking a job away from a “real American”. Although he speaks with a noticeable Scottish accent, everyone he meets assumes that he is a U.S. citizen (which he is not) – a “real American”. I couldn’t help contrasting this with my family’s immigration experience as Jews fleeing from Eastern Europe or with how refugees and asylum seekers are being treated.

Click here for information about additional Break the Hate sessions

Photographs: Courtesy of Union Baptist Church

Breaking the Hate: A Discussion about Racism and Antisemitism

BTH PIC 1Sixteen Shomrei members attended a discussion about antisemitism and racism facilitated by Rabbi Greenstein and Pastor Singleton at Union Baptist Church on February 13. Several of the people who attended share their recollections and thoughts about the evening:

Miriam Haimes
Pastor Singleton welcomed the participants and immediately engaged everyone by asking which congregations were represented. Many local synagogue and church members were present. This brought a feeling of inclusiveness from the beginning. He then opened with a recitation of the Sh’ma noting that there is only one G-d regardless of how we worship or what we look like.

A question and answer between Rabbi Greenstein and Pastor Singleton ensued where each shared some history of hate. Rabbi Greenstein spoke about the history of the word antisemitism and that this was an invention of recent history. He noted that there is no such thing as semitism so the word should not be hyphenated. He also spoke about the long history of the Jewish people and their ability to survive after many struggles and attempts to wipe them out. Both the Rabbi and the Pastor spoke about the change in teaching regarding the death of Jesus and the Pastor explained that the Union Baptist Church of Montclair teaches that sin killed Jesus, not the Jewish people.

Pastor Singleton asked the Rabbi to explain about the Jewish people and also encouraged the participants to be hopeful and helpful rather than hateful and hurtful. The Pastor noted that education and awareness were key to understanding. Also there was discussion about understanding individuals as humans and not generalizing all people of a color or religion.

The participants then split into groups to answer some questions about racism and antisemitism. The group work was very rewarding as people shared personal stories and in a few short minutes shared experiences and some laughs as well. Understanding individual experience is key to “breaking the hate”.

While progress was made at the gathering in building connections, both the Pastor and the Rabbi agreed to continue the conversations and that they would get back to the participants with future plans.

Overall, the evening was a beginning for members of various local communities to begin to gain understanding of one another and each other’s struggles.

Ann Lippel
I realized that the most difficult thing we have to do in order to really understand the perspectives of other people is to listen. It is not so much listening to the words of someone with whom we happen to share the same physical space at any given moment- although surely the words give us the context for understanding – it is more listening beyond the words. Hearing the feelings that must have engendered the words -or sensing the expanse of time the speaker has been grappling with this notion – this helps me feel I am getting to know the speaker. If we can listen that way, we will naturally be reticent about reacting too quickly or making quick judgements. Listening is the challenging part; really knowing is the reward.

BTH PIC 7Zelda Greenstein
Hate is an ugly word.
I think both the Rabbi and the Pastor made that very clear with their very honest approach to the discussions and I believe that what I experienced in my little group discussion was very affected by their approach and that a true attempt was made to erase the hate.
I would love to continue participating in this process.

Nick Levitin
For me the evening had an impact beyond anything I could have imagined. When we broke up into groups I was with 6 woman – 3 of whom were white and 3 who were African American. We were asked to respond to several written questions. One of them was how racism in Montclair had effected us. Two of the African American participants were young women, congregants of the Union Baptist Church where the meeting was held. The first spoke movingly about the pain she suffered as the result of growing up as “the other.” She spoke from from heart, more with a sense of puzzlement rather than bitterness or rage about the pain she had experienced. Most of what she said, I had heard before in documentaries or on television. But, here was someone sitting two feet from me telling me her story and it was devastating. How invisible she felt growing up in Montclair, with few if any among the white community who understood what it was like being viewed as so different. I was moved to tears. Her friend who was a light skinned African American shyly described what it was like growing up being referred to as “not like the others” “a good black.” Others in our groups also shared moving stories of their experiences. Although I think of myself as someone who knows about racism, the evening was a revelation to me. I was shaken and couldn’t return to “normal” life as if nothing had happened. I had been sensitized to something I had an intellectual understanding of, but not an emotional one.

Rabbi Greenstein’s talk about anti-semitism was also powerful. To hear him say that one of the origins of anti-semitism was the Church’s teaching that the Jews killed Jesus was something that I didn’t expect and went to the heart of how pernicious anti-semitism can be. Pastor Singleton was a warm, welcoming host committed to creating an atmosphere were people could be heard. It was an important evening. One which will lead to other evenings at different churches and synagogues around town. I hope that Shomrei members will make a major effort to attend. The times we live in demand that we challenge prejudice, not just by the way we think, but by our actions as well. Meetings like this have the possibility of not only changing the way we think, but creating community beyond our own where we can learn and grow together with our neighbors.

BTH PIC 5

Click here for information about additional Break the Hate sessions

Photographs: Courtesy of Union Baptist Church

Nick Levitin: This Year’s Honoree in Three Acts

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For Nick Levitin, the true meaning of life lies in service—to serve people and God. His passion for people and his commitment to service are the bookends of his journey, and they created the groundwork on which he served. As a kid growing up on Long Island in a secular family with no Jewish education, serving as President of not one but two synagogues was never part of his childhood game plan. He did not join a synagogue until he was 39. But first, he would follow his dreams onto the stage. Continue reading